Words of Affirmation and Assurance
Mary Beth Guy
Saturday, November 10, 2:00 p.m.

In his book Life of the Beloved, Henri Nouwen offers a helpful perspective about death. He says: “There is such a thing as a good death. We have to choose between clinging to life in such a way that death becomes nothing but failure… Or letting go of life in freedom so that we can be given to others as a source of hope. If our deepest human desire is indeed to give ourselves to others, then we can make our death into a final gift.” It seems that Mary Beth’s death was like this—a gift. Her greatest desire was to give herself to God and to others while she lived. But she also gave herself to God and to all of us while she died. She was so strong, so courageous, so tough—we began to believe that she would always weather the next storm, always pull through. But after this last round of being in the hospital, after multiple rounds of chemotherapy, after a number of surgical procedures… She was simply worn out. When it became apparent that her quality of life could not be sustained, Mary Beth made the decision to let go. And she prayed that it would happen quickly so that she would not be a continuing burden on those who loved and cared for her—especially her devoted mother and father and sister.

Rev. Guy, Helen, and Julie, our thoughts and prayers are with you and will continue to be with you. One of the most difficult things that anybody can experience is the loss of a child or sister—at any age or stage. You have experienced this twice, so our hearts go out to you. Mary Beth will be deeply missed. Our tears of grief and sadness are simply signs of how much she meant to us and how much we loved her. As one of her friends said, “There will be a hole in our universe where Mary Beth used to be.” One of the things that Mary Beth taught us as she cared for us was that we cannot move on until we “name” our grief and loss. The lesson comes right out of “Pastoral Care 101.” This is a profoundly painful loss for Mary Beth’s family and the Beargrass family, and everyone who loved her. So we have to “name” it and subject ourselves to the inevitable tears and laughter and aches and gladness that will come as we share our “Mary Beth Stories.”

AND YET, MARY BETH WOULD ALSO REMIND US THAT OUR TEARS OF GRIEF ARE NOT ALL THAT WE HAVE TODAY. We come together as those who have a common love for Mary Beth, but more importantly a common love for God. Mary Beth left us a rich legacy, many good gifts, and a myriad of memories of things that God taught us through her life. During her ministry, she always wanted to be the directional sign to point people on to God.

Julie found a poem that was included with some of her other special documents and papers—The Pulley by George Herbert. “When God first made woman and man, having a glass of blessings standing by; God said, “Let us pour on them all we can; let the world’s riches, which dispersed lie, contract into a span.” So strength first made a way; then beauty flowed, then wisdom, honor, pleasure: when almost all was out, God made a stay, perceiving that alone of all the treasure, rest in the bottom lay. “For if I should,” said God, “Bestow this jewel also on my creatures, they would adore my gifts instead of me, and rest in Nature, not the God of Nature: so, both should losers be.” “Yet let them keep the rest, but keep them with repining restlessness: let them be rich and weary, that at least…if goodness lead them not, yet weariness…may toss them to my breast.”

Herbert’s words capture Mary Beth’s approach to ministry. She said, “Far and away, the most satisfying moments of ministry are when someone allows you to bring the presence of God into their lives… When through your efforts a person feels God’s presence in the joys and sorrows of life.” The scripture passages that we have heard today hold within them the common thread of working or laboring or serving. This theme was the essence of Mary Beth’s life. And for over 30 years, her humble, willing-to-get-her-hands-dirty, servant attitude and example have rubbed off on us. The primary Bible passage that Mary Beth tried to live out is inscribed in a gift that was given to her from her family. They gave her a Bible for her graduation in 1969. The inscription reads: II Timothy 2:15, “Do your best to present yourself as one approved by God, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly explaining the word of truth.” Of course, Mary Beth has lived out the inscription and loved the family that gave it to her—and they have lots of delightful memories. One of her grandfathers was bi-vocational—a wallpaper hanger and a preacher. So she was not only a “PK” but a “GPK.”

Her training for pastoral care ministry began very early—in her childhood as a matter of fact. She was not allowed to cross the street as a young girl, but she figured out that she could go around the block. So she did. And she befriended the folks in the neighborhood. She was the family’s good will ambassador—and she particularly enjoyed visiting with older adults. From a very early age, Mary Beth revered and honored the wisdom and maturity and experiences of the elderly. This was a God-given gift that she shared the rest of her life—and which made her so beloved by the church family.

We are also aware of her love of life and adventuresome spirit! She embraced the fullness of all aspects of life—anything from giggin’ frogs to water-skiing to riding on the bow of the boat to going on a wild western adventure with Zelma or swinging through Sweden. She loved life!

A couple of years ago there was an article in the Beargrass Magazine to celebrate her 30th year of ministry at Beargrass. One of our elders interviewed her and asked this question: “How would you characterize your reception by the Beargrass congregation in 1975?” Mary Beth described the reaction of the congregation—the matter was actually pretty controversial at the time. Beargrass was a “male-leader-only” church, and it essentially “backed itself into” inclusiveness of women as elders by calling her to serve in ministry! Surprise—she loved that! And she confessed, “There were also rumors that preceded my coming to Louisville that I had a sports car, drove too fast, and owned a motorcycle.” She said—“Not true; I never owned a motorcycle.”

Even with her hobbies and extracurricular interests, Mary Beth celebrated life or was preserving life for others. She served as a lifeguard for many years and was proficient in water safety, lifesaving, and scuba diving. She enjoyed gardening and God’s gifts in nature—this is something that she and Julie shared together. Two of the hymns we have sung today affirm Mary Beth’s love for the garden—especially as a place of sanctuary and retreat and getting in touch with God. And of course, she loved her dogs—the bigger the better! Her dog would often sit in the passenger seat of that little blue Porsche convertible—ears flapping and hair blowin’ in the wind—the dog’s too. And Shadow is the size of a small pony and an honorary member of the staff at Beargrass.

Mary Beth was also incredibly gifted in a variety of mechanical and home-repair skills. She would just as soon be under the hood of a car or on a ladder or wading through a flooded basement or painting. Whatever—she could do it! And she had a respect not only for people who had been around for a while but for things that had been around for a while—she saw the value of caring for them and being a good steward. The candelabra that are here today were rescued by Mary Beth—for her candlelight represented the Spirit of God. She was a strong proponent for moving the pipe organ to this new place of worship—and she wanted us to pull out all of the stops today!

Professionally, she was a well-respected colleague and co-worker. Rick and Sue Rintamaa remember their days driving back and forth to Hiram, Ohio, in one of Mary Beth’s “old jalopies.” “Mary Beth was always the serious chauffeur, sharing her growing wisdom humbly and with a friendly smile. It seemed that over the years she never changed, her gentle demeanor meant she was always approachable and the years-ahead-of-herself common sense wisdom she shared was right on target. She couldn’t wait to get out of school and get on with life, but she knew she had to get the right foundation and credentials to be successful in her ministry. She resisted ordination because she never wanted to get ‘puffed up’ about ministry by rising in status, but just wanted to serve, love, and be on mission with others. If anyone ever asks what ministry in the name of Christ Jesus looks like, just reflect the face of Mary Beth to them, she’s the best representative I know.”

And someone who started working with Mary Beth more recently, Julie Richardson Brown, shares these eloquent reflections about this one who was a pioneer for women in ministry and who has paved the way for generations to come. Julie describes a recent hospital visit: “Her lips are dried to cracking from chemo, her skin drawn and tight, her muscles wasting away. She ‘should have’ died six years ago—whatever that means. And now I think longs to close her eyes and go in peace. Still, the brilliant mind and deep, deep compassion are there, and I know she’s so aware that we all come, one by one, group by group, to say goodbye. For well over three decades—almost longer than I have been alive—she’s been mother, friend, shepherd, and pastor to this congregation she and I both serve. In the name of her Creator she has held the hands of those facing pain and loss, held in her arms those filled with joy, offered to all who came for it…bread and wine. Crotchety and determined, abrasive and tough, she’s been the one constant for multiple generations, celebrating new life and honoring those gone with a passion for the gospel that few can match. When my own child came to this place for the first time, it was Mary Beth who took her from my arms and slowly, joyfully, and intentionally carried her around from person to person, smiling these words, ‘Here’s our new baby!’ I’m not sure any child has had a better introduction to extended family. And so today I took my daughter to see her. Despite the lines and tubes running in and out of her, and the pain it must have caused her, she reached her arms out for Maddy, held her to her chest and smiled. ‘I thought,’ I said, ‘that it might do you good to see another generation of Disciples women.’ Her smile deepened, she whispered her thanks, and around the full room, we all paused in silence at the pure grace of the very sick and the very young. One day I will tell Maddy that a great woman once held her, a woman who paved the way for women like me to follow God’s call to ministry.”

EARLIER I SUGGESTED THAT MARY BETH’S DEATH WAS A “GOOD DEATH,” ANOTHER GIFT. Even after the transition from full-time ministry to part-time ministry last June, she continued to serve the church family incredibly well. She intentionally began to rotate her attendance between the weekend services so she could keep in touch with everybody. She continued to visit those in the hospitals and the homebound. She officiated at a number of memorial services. On September 18, she helped us say good-bye to Mary Love Bowman—97-years of age. Mary Beth commented, “One of the joys of my ministry has been to be around such wonderful people like Mary Love—I’ve been hoping they would rub off on me.”

On October 14, she attended the 11:00 worship service. She had become so weak that she did not stand to sing the hymns during the service—but she was there. After the service ended, there was a fender-bender out front. Guess who was the first one on the scene from the church to offer help? Later that afternoon, one of our members was to take communion to Catherine Young. She tried to call Catherine to see if it was alright to come. Someone picked up the phone, but there was no response. She called Mary Beth to see if she knew anything. Mary Beth realized that Catherine had probably had a stroke, called 9-11, and met the EMTs at the house. Then she sat with Catherine at the hospital for several hours until the family arrived.

And even from her hospital bed, Mary Beth was getting things organized and thinking about other people. She had every intention of attending the General Butler retreat last weekend—that was plan “A.” But she also had a plan “B, C, D, E, and F” if things prevented her from being there. She had a couple of “up” days in the hospital before she was moved on to the Hospice Unit. Out of the blue, she came up with the idea for cremation after her service. She realized that this would give her mom and dad time to recover before the committal service in Ohio. And I’d like to say that you won’t believe this—but you will—because we’re talking about Mary Beth. When Mary Beth was being moved from the gurney into the bed at the Hospice Unit—even though she was heavily medicated—she was jostled around enough to come out of it for a moment. She looked at the nurses around her bed and said, “And what can I do for you?” Those were her last words—words that she had spoken with genuine, loving sincerity for years and years and years.

For Mary Beth, one Story has ended, but a new one has begun. And in that new Story, death will be no more. Mourning and crying and pain will be no more. In place of death, there will be light! In place of death, there will be joy! In place of death, there will be life! Thanks be to God, who gives us these gifts through our Lord Jesus Christ! And thanks be to God for the gift of the life of Rev. Mary Beth Guy.

Committal Service for Rev. Mary Beth Guy
Tiverton Cemetery Ohio, Nov.12, 2007

On behalf of Rev. Mary Beth Guy’s family, thank you all for your prayers, presence, and support during this very difficult time in their lives. Our time here today is a continuation of a celebration of Mary Beth’s life that we shared Saturday in Louisville. Hundreds of people came by during the visitation and hundreds attended the memorial service to thank God for the gift of her life to us.

We found comfort and strength in several scripture passages that were read on Saturday. We heard the call to “seek justice, love kindness, and walk humbly with our God” from Micah 6. We listened to the words in II Timothy about “fighting the good fight.” From Matthew we heard the “Parable of the Talents” and the words of praise from the Master: “Well, done, good and faithful servant. We also reflected upon the story of the Good Samaritan. The common theme—the common thread throughout was one of service, faithfulness, dedicated ministry—all passages that described her so well.

I invite you to hear some words of comfort and assurance for this day from Psalm 23 and the Gospel of John (Rev. Philip Hunt).

One of Mary Beth’s favorite illustrations was a story about an actor and a minister who recited the 23rd Psalm. The actor delivered the words eloquently. But the faithful pastor shared the passage as one who “knew the Shepherd.” Mary Beth is one who not only “knew the Shepherd,” but also served as shepherd and pastor to thousands of people during her lifetime.
As people of faith, we can find a great deal of comfort and strength in these promises from Jesus and these passages from Scripture. From the perspective of faith, we believe that death is not something that defeats us. It is just an ending, which leads to a glorious new beginning in the arms of our loving God.
One of Mary Beth’s friends offered these reflections: “Our lives are marked with the spots where we touched her life. Our hearts are broken that this treasured friend has gone. But she has received her eternal reward—if anyone deserves eternal dwelling in the house of God, this is the one. Her work is done, her worry about others is eased, and her rest has finally come. God bless you, Mary Beth, as you meet God face to face finally, and keep warm in that eternal love.”
Prayer: I would ask that we pray, and at the end of my prayer, let’s pray the Lord’s Prayer together...O God of Light and Life and Love everlasting, we give thanks that you are with us, and that we are with each other, and that Mary Beth is with you. We thank you for your tender mercy, and your amazing grace. We thank you for the love that you have shown to us in Jesus the Christ. We are so grateful that even in the valley of the shadow of death, your light shines, your peace prevails, and your presence surrounds us. Even though we feel a sense of loss, we are so very grateful for the gift of the life of Mary Beth, and for the countless ways she touched so many lives for the good. We give thanks for her faithful witness and example. We are inspired by the way she lived out her ministry—as “one approved by You, a worker who had no need to be ashamed, rightly explaining the word of truth.”

Today we commit what is mortal to this resting-place, and we commend her spirit to you, with the sure and certain hope of the resurrection Jesus promised.
We continue our prayer as pray the prayer Jesus taught us....

Closing Thoughts and Benediction: Here are a few thoughts as our time here comes to a close. We have been blessed with some beautiful fall days lately. As her friend and colleague, John Hull, mentioned during her service, Mary Beth was very much in tune with the seasons of the year. The changing of the seasons can provide helpful perspectives about the changing seasons of our lives. Just as autumn and winter give way to new life in the spring, death gives way to new life in the presence of God.

I have brought a leaf from one of the maple trees at Beargrass Christian Church—trees that Mary Beth has known for over 30 years. In the fall, they’re beautiful! With the touch of their Creator’s hand, they are transformed into gold—they light up the corner of Browns Lane and Shelbyville Road! And they remind me of Mary Beth—they have been tough. Even though they’ve been dinged and damaged, even though they’re covered up in chemicals from the exhaust of passing cars, even though the utility folks have come in and taken parts of them away—they don’t know any better. Every fall they proclaim the glory of God and praise God with their golden radiance.

Ruth Larson has written some appropriate words for this time of the year and for this time we share today. She compares the season of autumn with the season of our lives called death. Imagine a beautiful, colorful leaf falling to the ground. She says: “Now is the moment for the quiet letting go, for trusting that it will be a gentle floating to the earth. For knowing that even there, a purpose will be served because the life of the sun and soil and tree will continue...because of the final letting go. If death be like this, I will not mind the final letting go.”
Today is the day for quietly letting go of Mary Beth. She will be missed. But from the perspective of faith, we give thanks that she has been released from the limitations of this life. We give thanks that God has welcomed her home. Well done, good and faithful servant, family member, colleague, and friend! Mary Beth has gone on to walk with God in heaven; we go now to walk with God in this world. And as we go, may the peace of Christ be with us all, both now and forevermore, Amen.